When we first got here there were three constant things that people would tell me:
1) eat street hawker food – check
2) go to the malls – quadruple check
3) beware of purse snatchers - unfortunately, check
As of last week I can check off being a victim of a purse snatching attempt. I was walking home from the metro station, on the same two minute route that I always take, and on a very public and busy street, when two men on a speeding motorbike approached me. That’s how they do it here, one guy drives while the other sits in the back and sees what he can get away with. It’s a major problem here and whereas before it was common at night, it is now far too common to occur during broad daylight.
I’ve seen bikes on sidewalks before so I simply I thought that they were making a u-turn from the adjacent one-way street and I took steps to the side to get out of the way. But, within seconds, I felt and saw the guy sitting on the back pull my hand-purse, let go, and then speed away. I didn’t realize what had happened until they were gone. I was in shock. Never in my life have I experienced a violation like that. Thankfully there were two women behind me who witnessed it and had it not been for their post-attempt company I don’t think that I would have kept my calm the way I did. What was most troubling was how casual the encounter had been: the guy went for it but when he realized that I wasn’t holding my bag loosely enough to snatch it easily, they continued on … perhaps to the next victim. No big deal, just another afternoon and another drive-by.
Once at home I quickly locked the door behind me and started to process what had just happened. My mind started racing with questions like “how will I ever feel safe walking to the grocery store/metro/anything again?”, “what if they had taken my bag, all of my things are in there!” or ”why are we even living in a place where this sort of thing happens???”…
After a while I pulled myself together, thanking my lucky stars that it hadn’t been worse. I’ve heard awful stories of women being dragged on the ground or getting their arm slit with a knife. I was unharmed and still had my possessions. I was one of the lucky ones.
I didn’t leave the apartment until the weekend with Joe’s company but now I’m feeling better and all the more wiser. Unless I’m taking a taxi door-to-door I shouldn’t carry any unnecessary things, always use a cross body bag, keep phone and cards in my pockets, and don’t wear anything so bright that makes me a quick target from afar. All very simple things but I absolutely hate that I even have to think about them. I hate that I have to be on guard walking down the street, clinching my bag. And I hate that I have to be mentally and physically prepared to react should anything happen (again).
It’s a shitty way to feel when you walk outside and unfortunately I can’t see any obvious actions from the local government to prevent it. They post up signs to “be careful” but how about having some security on the streets so that it doesn’t happen in the first place? I have yet to see ONE police officer since we’ve moved here. Coming from a place like London where even though it had its own problems with crime, there was at least the backup of CCTV everywhere and there was always a cop nearby. In LA, well…I never really worried about anything, even when I lived near Skid Row. There may have been a lot of crazy drug addicts but they were harmless to people outside of their circles. Here you have multiple problems with street crime focused on women: motorbike purse snatchings, parking lot assaults, and street junction thefts where men on motorbikes break car windows and steal purses from the passenger seats during a red light. I mean, really??? What’s even more sad is that it’s all so common that some people have an “it is what it is” reaction to it. Take this story for instance. A girl gets attacked (and cut up) at a mall parking lot and the management says it happens everywhere and that it’s not serious. Excuse me??? It totally is serious! {Sigh} I should stop before I get really carried away as I think I’ve made my point.
The thing is, Malaysia is a beautiful country with beautiful people and things to offer but if it wants to be the tourist and industrial draw that it’s trying to be then those in charge need to get these problems under control. Women need to feel safe. And personally, I need to hone a different set of street smarts and be brave. There’s too much good here to let a few a-holes get to me.
i’m glad you’re fine. yes, it’s rather dangerous and there’s been too much snatch thefts in the country. always be careful – like the old adage – no matter what country, play safe because it’s not home.
you are absolutely right, i can get comfortable but not *too* comfortable. thanks, meds.
That really is a shitty thing to happen. I could go on and on here for, probably, HOURS about how I feel about being a woman and the daily thoughts we have to go through before leaving the house ‘just in case…’ but I won’t because that would make me a bit crazy. So glad you are safe, and I couldn’t agree more about the government needing to step up and make a stand against these kinds of awful crimes. Take care!
thanks, jo. i could go on forever, too. pretty sure i’ve talked joe’s ear off on the subject!
“Shitty” is the word. It’s a shitty act, you feel shitty afterwards and it’s shitty having to try and find some rationalisation for it.
My best friend lives in KL, has done for nearly two years and I’ve visited many times. I have luckily never experienced anything like this though I’ve heard about it and have also heard much worse (the indiscriminate throwing of acid at women’s faces in daylight in the popular and fairly upmarket area of Bangsar was the most horrifying story). It’s hard to live somewhere where this is a reality…
Stay strong, stay street wise and keep seeking out the beauty in Malaysia and its people!
Bird x
thank you, bird! definitely lots of beauty to seek and appreciate. the acid thing is new to me – my goodness!
I’m sorry Anamu. Glad you’re ok. This is a really lame truth about the region that not many talk about. I know some stories and I have my own too, even from squeaky clean Singapore. My most memorable one being the time I was attacked by an idiot purse snatcher in Ikea, Hong Kong, when I was 8 months pregnant. Thankfully that story had a silly ending when in my shock and rage I chased the idiot purse snatcher down the isle and managed to hit him over the head with a large cork bulletin board. He dropped my purse instantly and I can assure you he was just as in shock as I was! Don’t mess with a pregnant lady hey mister! But seriously, take care. and don’t worry, you will naturally get your street smart on as you adapt to your new surroundings. I find that channeling a sort of city of angeles toughness boosts morale and can lend confidence and strength for any uncertain times. best xx
Tanya, if I ever found myself in a similar position I would LOVE to give the same treatment to the guy! Preying on a heavily pregnant woman… He really has no shame. Good that you gave it to him, but I’m also glad that you weren’t harmed in any way. Thieves in KL are getting so brazen that they actually assault victims from the get go. :(
Ana, I hope you’ll mostly recover from the initial shock. I received an interesting piece of advice from a friend who attended a personal safety workshop – if ever you encounter a similar situation where a motorcyclist tries to snatch your purse, just SIT DOWN. So long as he is unarmed, this makes it really awkward for him to hold on to your purse and also keep his balance on the bike.
that’s a first i’ve heard of that, thanks Michelle! god, i can’t believe that i’m excited about anti-theft advice these days!
Thanks so much Tanya, it really is so helpful to hear your POV since you’ve been at this for longer than I have! And is it totally wrong that I laughed at your IKEA story? I can just imagine the shock on his face when you went after him and hit him with a cork board! Amazing story – glad he didn’t get away with it.
Mu! What a scary story! I am very glad that you and your belongings are safe. Love you!
4 years in New York and never once did I feel threatened. It really helps when the government takes a protective and preventative attitude regarding petty theft and personal assault. Chris did get mugged in Brooklyn as you’ll remember and it was very scary indeed. Mostly he was in a bad neighborhood and didn’t know it. That experience is still with him today and he still jumps if he hears someone walking behind him. Do your best to keep your eyes open to signs and try and blend in when you’re out and about. A good trick I always used when I’d come home late in NYC was to put all my keys in between my fingers so if I needed to punch someone, it would leave a mark. ;) Mostly I’m just so glad you’re OK and hopefully you guys will be back in the States in the next few years where you can walk home in peace. ;) xoxo
i thought of chris and that mugging – it’s unsafe everywhere but at least in the states is in pockets of bad areas that you can avoid. here it’s happening in the good areas! i definitely do the keys thing but it’s kinda useless with the motorbikes unfortunately. thanks my love!
Glad you are safe. Sadly there are many beautiful places in the world where bad things exist.
Gosh, poor you. What a horrible shock you always get from such incidents. I’m very pleased to hear you and your bag were both ok, if a little shaken, and that you have adopted such a pragmatic approach to what happened/carrying on with life as normal.
My grandmother was dragged on the street by a purse snatcher on a motorcycle once … It’s awful. So glad you’re OK.
ugh that is awful. so sorry…and thank you.
So scary! I’m really glad you’re okay.
xo
cortnie
I will be traveling to KL end of July. While I have lived in Thailand for a year, I do not know too much else about Malaysia. Thanks for your blog post I will now be better prepared during my stay in KL. I’m sorry to hear about your encounter though, no matter how much it may help other travelers like myself. Stay safe.
Hi Krystal, yes just be aware of your surroundings a bit more than you normally would as a traveler. Glad this was helpful in prepping for your trip!
wow – i somehow missed this post – sorry to hear about this – that’s crazy you haven’t seen any cops since you moved there.
I have since the post but I have also learned via some new local friends that their not much for helping or fighting crime anyhow.
My husband and I got mugged while traveling in Nicaragua and unfortunately situations like yours and mine are what make us never look at the world/public/assumed safety the same way again. I think we are both lucky that we were unharmed by the situation because it leaves us with more street smarts for next time, or at least making sure we are doing all that we can to ensure that there isn’t a next time! I hear ya though, I don’t think I’d be too excited to go out an about on my own after that! I just moved to Cambridge, MA where I see people walking around, at night (!!!) with headphones in, oblivious to the world around them. Uh huh, no way Jose, not me, or you! We know better, lol!
I’m off to read your archives because you’ve inspired me to take life as it comes at you. (Not so much the purse snatching stuff but the experience of moving to a completely different country and culture!) :)
Megan
Yikes – so sorry you both experienced that. And yes, we are more the wiser now – anywhere we are! glad you’ve found a bit of inspiration here :)
hi,
I am sorry to hear that u are one of the victim..nowadays there are a lot of cases like that.Hope u will be more careful when u go outside.